Men Are Like – Male Jokes

Mar 15

Men Are Like – Male Jokes

Men are like a fine wine… They start out as grapes and it’s up to women to stomp the shit out of them until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner...

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Mayday! – Male Jokes

Mar 14

Mayday! – Male Jokes

Pierre, a brave French fighter pilot, takes his girlfriend, Marie, out for a pleasant little picnic by the River Seine. It’s a beautiful day, and love is in the air. Marie leans over to Pierre and says: “Pierre, kiss me!” Our hero grabs a bottle of Merlot wine and splashes it on Marie’s lips. “What are you doing, Pierre?” says the startled Marie. “I am...

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Male Etiquette – Male Jokes

Mar 13

Male Etiquette – Male Jokes

Any Man who brings a camera to a stag night may be legally killed or beaten by his fellow partygoers. Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella. It is ok for a man to cry under the following circumstances: a. When a heroic dog dies to save his master b. The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her blouse c. After wrecking your boss’ car d. One hour,...

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Male Bashing Q and A – Male Jokes

Mar 12

Male Bashing Q and A – Male Jokes

Q: Why do men become smarter during sex? A: Because they are plugged into a genius. Q: Why don’t women blink during foreplay? A: They don’t have time. Q: Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize 1 egg? A: They won’t stop for directions. Q: Why did God put men on earth? A: Because a vibrator can’t mow the lawn. Q: Why don’t women have men’s...

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If Only Men Would Listen – Male Jokes

Mar 11

If Only Men Would Listen – Male Jokes

A man is driving up a steep, narrow mountain road. A woman is driving down the same road. As they pass each other, the woman leans out of the window and yells, “PIG!!” The man immediately leans out of his window and replies, “BITCH!!” They each continue on their way, and as the man rounds the next corner, he crashes into a pig in the middle of the road. If...

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Leftover Gifts – Male Jokes

Mar 11

Leftover Gifts – Male Jokes

Seems God was just about done creating the universe, but he had two extra things left in his bag of creations, so he decided to split them between Adam and Eve. He told the couple that one of the things he had to give away was the ability to stand up while urinating. “It’s a very handy thing,” God told the couple, who he found under an apple tree. “I was...

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