Alright ladies, I admit… men have said some pretty corny things to break the ice. Pick-up lines have become somewhat of a novelty, only the coolest guys use them now (kidding). At any rate, here ar ethe top 10 corniest pickup lines I’ve ever heard (in no particular order). Ladies or Gents – feel free to add your own in the comments...

So I’m browsing through the home electronics section at Best Buy, looking for nothing in particular, when a salesman approaches me. Asks what I’m looking for and I reply with “something manly”. Says he’s got just the thing for me. Needless to say, I bought it. Doesn’t work though, I keep pointing and clicking but the nagging...

While I was watching football this weekend, my wife and I got into a conversation about life and death, and the need for living wills. During the course of the conversation I told her that I never wanted to exist in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and taking fluids from a bottle. She got up, unplugged the TV, and dumped out my...

Mr. and Mrs. Fenton are retired, and Mrs. Fenton insists her husband go with her to Wal-Mart. He gets so bored with all the shopping trips. He prefers to get in and get out, but Mrs. Fenton loves to browse. One day Mrs. Fenton gets this letter from Wal-Mart: Dear Mrs. Fenton, Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a commotion in our...

A family is sitting around the supper table. The son asks his father, “Dad, how many kinds of breasts are there? The father, surprised, answers, “Well, son, there are three kinds of breasts. In her twenties, a woman’s breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her thirties to forties, they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit. After fifty,...

Alright, this goes against every male sperm in my body but, by popular request, it’s got to be posted. Seems there’s a rumor going around that we’re sexist (maybe she meant to say sexy), but at any rate we’re going to be burying that rumor right now (not the one about being sexy). Eh, lost a bit of my manhood on this one. Q: Why does it take 1...