A British doctor, a German doctor and an American doctor were chatting. The British doctor said, “Medicine in my country is so advanced that we can take a kidney out of one man put it in another and have him looking for work in six weeks.” Then the German doctor bragged, “That’s nothing, we can take a lung out of one person, put it in...

A married couple went to the hospital together to have their baby delivered. Upon their arrival, the doctor said he had invented a new machine that would transfer a portion of the mother’s labor pain to the father. He asked if they were willing to try it out. They were both very much in favor of it. The doctor set the knob to 10 percent for starters, explaining...

“He may look like an idiot and talk like an idiot but don’t let that fool you. He really is an idiot.” - Groucho Marx “His mind is so open – so open that ideas simply pass through it.” - F. H. Bradley “The stupid person’s idea of a clever person.” - Elizabeth Bowen talking about Aldous Huxley “Avoid all...

A teacher in a small Vermont town asks her class how many of them are John Kerry fans. Not really knowing what a John Kerry fan is, but wanting to be liked by the teacher, all the kids raise their hands except one boy. The teacher asks Johnny why he has decided to be different. Johnny says, “I’m not a John Kerry fan.” The teacher says, “Why...

The below excerpts appeared in the Salt Lake Tribune. They were taken from real court records and actually happened… Q: What happened then? A: He told me, he says, “I have to kill you because you can identify me.” Q: Did he kill you? Was it you or your brother that was killed in the war? The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he? Q: She had...

A busload of politicians were driving down a country road when the bus suddenly ran off the road and crashed into an old farmer’s field. The old farmer heard the tragic crash so he rushed over to investigate. He then began digging a large grave to bury the politicians. A few hours later, the local sheriff was driving past the farmer’s field and noticed...

One day theres a couple of kids in a phycology class. The teacher stands up and says to the class “stand up if u think you’re stupid!” after about 5 minutes Little Johnny stood up and the teacher says “do you think you’re stupid Johnny?” To which Little Johnny replies “No miss i just hate to see you standing there all by...

After numerous rounds of “We don’t even know if Osama is still alive,” Osama himself decided to send George Bush a letter in his own handwriting to let him know he was still in the game. Bush opened the letter and it contained a single line of Coded message: 370H-SSV-0773H Bush was baffled, so he e-mailed it to Condoleezza Rice . Condi and her...

Following up with the Top 10 Reasons for Becoming a Nurse, now that you’ve decided to go down the path of a self-less job that doesn’t get any respect – you’ll need to know some of the more commonly used terminology in the nursing industry. “No, really, I don’t mind changing the TV channel for you. Again.” “I’m...

Top 50 Dumbest Things President George W. Bush said in his first term: 50. “I promise you I will listen to what has been said here, even though I wasn’t here.” —at the President’s Economic Forum in Waco, Texas, Aug. 13, 2002 49. “We spent a lot of time talking about Africa, as we should. Africa is a nation that suffers from incredible...